A GLOBAL WARNING PART 3 (continued)

Sunday, January 2, 2011Part 3 A GLOBAL WARNING A waltergolden SHORT
Continued. . .
The front door crashed open and the hot desert wind blew straight in, tearing the rollihg smoke to tatters. Just before it disappeared, I materialized from the bottle, spread my leather wings until they brushed the ceiling, extended razor edged claws, bent down, and grinned at KC with teeth filed to sharp points.
Some of us just love to make an entrance.
And, we don't all look like Barbara Eden.
I put Mehdi to sleep, but left Bob alone. He was standing there, dazed. He would come in handy later.
"What the hell are you?" KC gasped, almost, but not quite, sobering up.
I bowed and made that Arabic heart-lips-and-mind salute they love so well in the movies. "I am your servant, Effendi. What are your wishes?"
He stared up at me, greed instantly replacing fear.
"I get three wishes, don't I?" he demanded, more than asked.
"Of course, Oh-Wise-Master." I knew what was coming next.
"I want half a million dollars. Not in gold, but in my bank account. And I want it untraceable.
To KC and Bob I hardly flickered, but it took a while. Still, time is the simplest of things. Over the last few decades I had paid a lot of attention to Hollywood, but not much to commerce, so I had some work to do. I studied the banking system and was amazed at how vulnerable it was. Not much better than the old guarded vaults and locked strong boxes. I filed that knowledge away for future reference. I was glad to see humans hadn't gotten smarter over the years. Next I manipulated the data, found the money, put it in KC's account, erased my tracks, crashed a few computers, just for the hell of it, and arrived back at the shop just as I left.
"It is done, Master," I said, all the while thinking KC was a piker. Usually my masters want millions, and they want it all in a large, hernia-producing gold pile.
KC licked his lips. Okay, now I need to live to spend it. He waved his arm north. "Go to Iraq; find all Saddam's weapons of mass destruction, and get rid of them.?
That didn't take long.
I did the flicker bit anyway and arrived back at the shop as Bob was examining the bottle. He looked up as I materialized and said, "Hey KC, I hear our next stop's North Korea. Have SharpTooth get rid of their bombs and maybe we won't have to go."
Once, long ago, back when it had been known as the Hermit Kingdom, I had been to Korea. I had no desire to return. The mountains are steep and the weather is abominable--and that wasn't the only thing abominable. It's not the Himalayas, but if you look hard enough you can find Yetis there. Though why anyone would want to look hard enough to find them is beyond me. They are huge, stupid creatures, bigger than I am--and stronger--and they smell. They're also immune to my powers, but luckily for me, just the slightest bit slower. I had no desire to see if they had grown faster over the years.
It was time for my exit. I used one of my tricks and Bob's fingers and palms suddenly extruded a silicone liquid not normally found in humans--though I understand that now days it is sometimes discovered in the female of the species.
The long neck of the bottle went sliding through Bob's hands, hit the stone floor and broke into a thousand pieces with a lovely, bell-like sound that filled the shop and rang my long-awaited note of freedom.

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